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The kidney is just the beginning: On the transplant Road


                 The last time I blogged I was still on dialysis twice a week two and a half hours a treatment. After six and a half years I was pretty much used to what my life was and how it was working out. Treatment didn’t bother me as much anymore and the pain was almost non existent or maybe I was just used to it. 


Just as I was all used to it on September 3, 2016 I received the call that has changed my whole existence. I got a kidney! My transplant happened when I least expected it. With a heart full of prayers for loved ones and friends I went to Saint barnabas medical center for my gift. On September 4 I had a new battery and ready to begin a new life with no more issues. But can you say hold up? 

Yes, we have no idea at least I had no idea that the transplant is just the beginning of the road. Not the end. The real work began after the blessing. 

Let’s talk about recovery shall we? 

I have been transplanted about three months now and currently in the hospital in a state I don’t even live in. I came to visit my mom for the holidays and my creatinine got too high so here I am admitted and awaiting. However I digress, I am still mighty blessed! Every day. 

When you first get a transplant you need your meds every twelve hours. The amount of pills vary from 20 to 30 Pills a day depending on how your organ is settling. See this organ was never yours. It’s a gift so you need anti rejection medications so you won’t loose it. You must work to keep it. This is why I say the work begins after the blessing. Along with medication comes recovery from a long suture on your belly. I had 20 some odd staples holding me together. Its difficult to walk but as the days go by you begin to feel better, more alive and healthier. My hair grew inches and my nails that never grew began to grow. My skin glowed and I became, though still recovering a new person. 

It is a difficult period in my life but full of miracles as well. I am getting there. Trust that I will. 

Getting used to the meds and the doctor twice a week in the beginning takes some getting used to. 

Blood work and urinalysis every week

Stint removal and fear of any little twinge on your access site wears on you but then you think about all of those years on dialysis and you’re mighty blessed and grateful despite side effects or anything else that comes along the most important thing to remember is that someone who died gave you life! 

This is a path. It has been my destiny thus far. I am on a road after all and I never forget that every road has hurdles and bumps and some even have mountains to arrive at the other side. This is my road and although sometimes it’s difficult and a trial I am fully faithful that God gave me this kidney and road for a reason. With his help, guidance and blessing I have my new battery and I’m ready to walk! 

Stay blessed and grateful! 

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Organizing my Life…On the transplant road


          Many of you who know me or have read my blog know that I have been on dialysis for about six years now. But if you also know me well you know I have never once felt sorry for myself or have fallen into pity party mode. There are too many sick people, especially children that have not really even lived for me to be complaining about being on dialysis. I am strong and able, this is just a moment in time for me and I will surpass it. I have many ways of keeping hope alive. I always say I know God and he knows me and when he wants me there is nothing that will stop it so every extra day is  blessing. I don’t intend to waste it.

As far as everything goes I am now tissue typing with my brother to see if we are a good match. My older brother has decided to go under the knife for me! I am beyond amazed at his selflessness and I know I would do the same for him were the roles reversed. Every test completed is a new step forward on the transplant road. A new step toward a normal life. I take every step in gratitude. I have made many changes of late because I want to live an organized and simple life. I am all about order and organizing and planning . I love anything that makes my life easier. I love functional yet beautiful things. As a writer who loves her craft I adore fabulous planbooks to write in and make my plans for the day. It puts everything into perspective for me and in a much clearer light.  I am learning a great deal on this road. Things that I hope to pay forward once my journey is done. For now I will do the best I can with what I have been given and although I’d rather not be on this road I am mighty grateful to be here at all. No matter where I may have to walk on this road the point for me is that I’m still walking and that my friends is a blessing.

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The rain keeps falling and I guess it’s a good a day as any to get the pen moving or in this case the fingers typing. Another dialysis day is here. I’m never quite ready for these days. I start to think about those needles, all the side effects of the process and I can’t help but feel distraught. With all the things that go wrong in life on a daily basis it is the one thing i regret the most. I don’t indulge in why me’s very often and I won’t do it today either. It’s not a me thing, many people are on dialysis so if I ask why me I’d have to ask why them? So, instead of asking why anything I will simply do what I must and accept what is, for now. Nothing lasts forever.
The rain just makes me thoughtful is all. I sit by the window and look at the beauty of it all. The rain comes down in sheets and seems to cover the world. When I was young I thought, depending on the skies that God was either crying for us, in cloudy dark days or taking a shower on rainy days with the sun shinning. Being a child is a beautiful thing.
Now I sit by the window and just marvel at how the skies roar as if angry and burst open to shower us with sheets of life giving water. It’s a gift what they give us. What God allows. I would have this rain fall in Africa they would not take it for granted. The children would be dancing in it praising the gift. Thanking the creator. We hide in our houses and complain for lack of sun. We have things to do to make our lives more complicated. There is too much work in sitting still and enjoying life’s growth. The trees and flowers beg to be looked at and we pass them by on our way to argue with the boss or tell someone else what to do. It is in the human condition to take gifts for granted I guess. I can’t say that I haven’t. I think I’m more receptive on dialysis days because I to am being given the gift of life no matter how painful. I am still blessed to have the chance to be here among the people I love. Any day the light switch might be turned off and not only through this illness the truth is that we all owe a death. We just don’t know the pay day.
If this were my last day I would borrow all the money I could and fly my family to Florence. Die in the midst of Michelangelo with a glass of wine and some mozzarella. Make a picture my family would not forget. Put flowers in my hair and dance around the Trevi fountain. What a day that would be! Still I hope to have many years and I hope to do those things without the fear of it being my last day.
The rain keeps falling. I keep day dreaming of pretty things enjoying the music of the pounding water drops.
Life, right now, in this silence. Is good.